Story behind the blog “ Finding will and ways”
One night after a really productive day, taking care of my house and family I sat down with my to do list. I looked at the list of 20 odd chores that I had striked off.
Yes! A Completely crossed off list means a super productive day. Usually this would make me happy enough to help me go to bed peacefully. But on this particular day, I decided to really look at this list.
Laundry, doing the dishes, cooking, putting away the grocery, re stocking diapers, calling the plumber etc.
Weekends were filled with attending weddings of people I didn’t know very well. This meant a lot of practiced smiling, spending time and energy on trivial discussions of expensive clothes, jewelry and family gossip. All this benefited none, on the contrary even if it was in small scale, did some damage.
I started to question myself
Are these the important elements that my life should be made up of? A person’s life as a whole is comprised of what he does day in and day out. It is those little activities that you practice each day that is going to decide your future. So what did my future hold? I had no clue.
I was stuck in the “I’m fine” situation which is worse than” I’m doing terrible”
If we thought our lives were terrible, at least we would try and take steps to change it. Being fine is a trap that is comfortable, cozy and warm. If we want to live an extraordinary life, we need to get out of this trap.
I wanted to be a child again
As children we all had crazy dreams. Dreams that sounded amazing at the time but may or may not be practical. Be an astronaut, become the next President, own a pony, live in a house built of chocolates, meet Pikachu etc. But we weren’t embarrassed to tell these dreams out loud because in our little hearts we knew these were achievable.
But as we grew older, we started conditioning our brains to believe in limitations. Limitation of time, limitation of skill, money etc.
The worst thing about these limitations is that they not only stop us from achieving our dreams, they won’t even let us try. But unless we try how would we know what we can create with the wealth of time, health and knowledge that god has very kindly bestowed upon us.
“If you’re not growing you’re dying”
When this realization hit me, it truly hit me hard. I realized what I did day in and day out were mundane activities that did not enrich my life or help me grow as a person. I always felt a void inside me. I could not pin point as to what the exact problem was, but it was there.
This void made me feel dissatisfied with my life which turned into frustration towards my family as I thought they were the reason. I thought my husband wasn’t appreciating me enough, my baby was taking up all my time and this will never change. But the real reason was ME
If you’re unhappy the reason is always within you, not the people outside or situations you’re in.
“Happiness is just a state of mind that you’re in control of”
So what was the real reason?
The real reason was that after being a mom I was so caught up in mom duties that I had forgotten to take care of ME. I loved my baby to death but if I wanted to be the best mommy to him, I needed to prioritize myself as well.
I had given up on my hobbies and interests. After a whole day of trying to be the perfect mom, wife, and daughter in law I was mentally and physically drained. But this had to change.
So I sat down with a pen and a paper and wrote down how I felt. I read what I wrote and realized what looked like a beautiful life on the outside is actually a boring, unfulfilled life in these pages.
I just existed and was not living my life.
I turned the page over and without over thinking just wrote down everything I would like to achieve to lead my perfect life.
One of the things I wrote down was to combine my interest to write and help others with inspiring, thought provoking articles that adds value to their lives. A blog was the perfect answer to this.
After being a mom we tend to lose our identity. In course of trying to provide the perfect life for our husbands and kids we forget ourselves.
I want to call out to the wonderful mommies out there, to break free of the false limitations they have set on themselves. Be the moms that inspire, achieve and take on the world.
Don’t just survive, THRIVE AND SHINE.